A Heavy Heart

My heart is heavy today.  I was supposed to be working on a presentation I have to give in my Wednesday night class this week.  Instead, I am sitting, laptop open, with worship music playing in the background.  I can't seem to drag myself away from it.  I have always felt that God speaks to me the most through music and today is no different.  This week seems to have been filled with people sharing the struggles they are going through in their lives.  Some of it is just so heavy.  Friend's parents getting divorced after 30 years of marriage.  A dear friend's mother diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer - after losing her sister to suicide a few years ago - and a brother who is so incredibly verbally abusive that she can't even repeat the things he says to her.  A coworker's brother died of a sudden heart attack this week - 2 days before his wedding day.  

As I've sat here, thinking and praying for these people, the song, "Praise You In This Storm" by Casting Crowns came on my playlist.  Well, these people sure are going through some storms.  As I listened to these words, I wondered how it could be possible for people, in such pain, to praise God through it all. 

I was sure by now, God you would have reached down and wiped our tears away, stepped in and saved the day but once again I say, "Amen" and it's still raining. As the thunder rolls I barely hear You whisper through the rain, "I'm with you." And as Your mercy falls, I'll raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away.  I'll praise You in this storm and I will lift my hands.  You are who You are no matter where I am. Every tear I've cried You hold in Your hand. You never left my side. Though my heart is torn I will praise You in this storm. 

And then the tears started.  Right at the part that says, "I barely hear You whisper through the rain, 'I'm with you.'" THAT is what makes it possible to praise Him.  In such a broken, painful world...He never leaves us.  Sometimes, in the midst of such powerful storms, it's hard to hear His gentle whispers.  I am beyond grateful though, that He is there, gathering the tears.